By Victor Omondi – (Soruce: www.ourblackworld.net) – Rachel Cargle, a Brooklyn author and activist, was raised in a normal family setup. Speaking to TODAY Parents, she said she’d never at any one point growing up thought she’d ever go for a life without kids.
“I was, very much so, intent on checking the boxes of job, marriage, kids, and so I can’t say that I would fit in the ‘I’ve always known’ category,” said Cargle. “I was under the impression that motherhood was a requisite of my womanhood, and so my desire to be a mother was auto-piloted based on that. It took a lot of honest observation and considerate introspection to both come to the decision and to be able to vocalize it.”“The emotional effort of raising a human in a world like the one we’re living in — especially knowing I’d be giving birth to a child who would live in Black skin,” she added.
After taking a deep and honest introspection into the whole issue of parenting, including the solitude that one’s denied when children are around, as well as the financial struggle that often comes with it, Cargle decided to opt out.
The 32-year-old is among the many women whose numbers keep rising, the women who’ve decided to take the child-free route. Many of them say they’re child-free rather than childless, since the latter term wouldn’t really fit their feelings about parenthood accurately.
Speaking to TODAY, Dr. Shannon Curry, a clinical psychologist and director of the Curry Psychology Group, pointed out that women go through a lot of pressure from society to get married and have children.
“The universal narrative tends to be that if you don’t have children you will miss out on the full life experience,” she said.
Dr. Curry also mentioned the common myths that the society holds about women. Some of the myths are that failure to have children will bring about regret later on in life and that they’d lack a source of care when they age, as most adult children do to their parents.
“In actuality, there is no evidence to support any of these beliefs, as pervasive as they are,” she pointed out.
https://www.today.com/parents/child-free-choice-why-women-intentionally-opt-out-parenthood-t210203
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